I feel a contraction in my gut. I had an all day online seminar for the last few days so I did not get to post. It is very easy for me to be hard on myself. I am trying to relax the contraction I feel. Some words of Kristen Neff come to me, loosely paraphrased: This is a moment of suffering (contraction), we all have such moments, what can I do to be kind to myself in this moment. I feel myself breathing more deeply as I think that and the contraction releasing a bit.
As I check in, I’m hearing “I was supposed to, I didn’t and now I’m bad”. My heart space feels like it’s getting smaller and more rigid. It feels like contraction, as if a rubberband were around the area of my heart. I see my heart attempting to move away and yet being snapped back into place with force. I’m aware of it and I don’t like it. I see a scissors and notice I have the power to cut and release the rubber band. As I cut I feel instant relief. It feels like a warm rush of ease washing over my entire body. When I think of doing what I’m supposed to do vs feel called to do, the supposed to feels tight and restrictive and almost burning in my chest. Feeling called to with no requirement brings deep breaths and feeling expansive and light. I hear “release the must do and listen to the want to”.
After reading three new posts, I felt the same after reading each. I feel so grateful and honored to be in association with all of you mindful aware people in our community. When I now enter this Heart Fluency app space, it is as if I am entering a sacred space. It is reminding me how I felt at my grandfathers farm, and how I felt in my dance group, at home and safe. I am thoroughly enjoying this as it feels so nourishing to my soul. We can all help shift the entire world by our own self compassion. It is so deeply heart warming, and touching. I feel a warm glowing energy all over me like being wrapped in a warm blanket to rest right there with you. Thank you all for your compassion.❤️
As I read your message I felt a deep sense of recognition and relating to your share. I also many times tend to be hard on myself. Lately I have been able to take a step back and notice who is being hard? and on what? I return to my intentions and that breath softens this place even more.
Thank you for reminding me of this conscious act of breathing, especially when in contracted moments.
Love and blessings,